The title alone sums up what I’m trying to answer by even starting this blog. Do we really pay much attention to what is going on around us or is it simply background noise? Or in this case….words. Am i simply contributing to yet another blog post that will join along with infesting the internet like maggots?
Do you know how long it took me to even find a name for this damn blog? 20 minutes!!!! Everything I chose that even slightly resembled the gibberish I’m planning on posting was taken. Out of sheer curiousity, I typed a few of those names to see the blogs and not surprisingly they were left unused since 2007 or even completely blank with excepton to the first post announcing how wonderful their blog will be and their intention to post daily lol.
I give no promises to that. This might be my one and only post. I felt a creative urge today and decided to act upon it. There’s probably a million other things I should be doing that would be more worth while but what the hell. In the end, is anything we’ve done all that important. Did it make a difference? Does anyone even remember? Probably not.
But enough negativity, I’m using this blog as an online journal. Remember when we used to use books and….um…those things called pens? Lately, I’ve been feeling lost. I’m living a life born out of necessity due to my own choices of the past and have sort of forgetten about who I am, or what I used to dream of becoming.
As mentioned above, I’m one of the people who doesn’t really pay that much attention to what’s going on around me. My mind is always preoccupied with the daily intrusions of just surviving till the next day. When I can do it all over again. I keep hoping things will get better but as the days, weeks and so on past by, my motivation decreases to the point where in fact I’m further behind then when I started. It’s a vicious cycle.
So if this blog continues…..big if…..my goals are to record things about my daily life that normally I wouldn’t think twice about. I want to start being more aware of myself and my surroundings. Understand it all and maybe then I can fix the issues that are holding me back.
Just in the process of writing this, I’ve been made aware of a habit I have that I want to try to correct. Self editing. This blog is intented to be a bunch of crap, personal jibberish that most likely won’t benefit or interest anyone who unfortunately stumbles across it. But even still, I keep scrolling up with the intention to improvise on some of the things I’ve written. Reword, rephrase or just delete all together because God forbid it might not be what people want to read.
These are words that are coming straight from my head at this very moment and I want the rest of my posts to be the same so as a result, I will not be removing or adding (except that, I just added that) anything. This might mean that you see some typos or incomplete thoughts. Maybe I’ll get completely off topic and start writing about something else. It is the madness of my mind and all of you strangers are invited to experience it.